Samantha
15
The sun rose and everything fell. It seemed like Alex’s mind was a machine, having a meltdown after 16 years of operation. Not that it had ran perfectly, though. His head throbbed as a series of maggots rummaged curiously through the recesses of his mind. It was a Wednesday morning, and Alex needed to hop on the bus, but he couldn’t even lift his lanky figure, nevermind his head. He had special plans for today- show off his new unicorn capris, get an A on his autobiography, “Potato in a Rose Garden”, and..wait, what? One maggot peeled a note from a frontal lobe and read aloud.
“Go to the lab to get the proper ingredients for chloroform.”, Gavin the maggot read. “Then cover a washcloth with it and replace Jeffrey's gym washcloth with it.” The maggot hissed. He knew that teenagers could be a bit odd, but this young man had something off in his wiring. He slipped the note back in and pulled out another one. “Replace the water in the water fountain with the sodium fused tears of my misery.” His face contorted in disgust and he reached for his notepad. Disturbed sadist, he scribed. Alex’s limbic system conveyed that the young man was simmering in a state of confusion. Meanwhile, another one of the bugs plodded into the perhaps most grotesque area yet-the prefrontal cortex. Here, they would be tuned into his history, from the time Alex was a pudgy patootie to his tween years. Alex heard a loud snicker as maggot Bruce hopped onto the play button, the film of an old memory projecting itself onto the walls encasing his brain. I still have that?, Alex thought. The video showed a tinier version of himself, likely 3-4 months old, lying in a crib, clad into a powder-blue onesie that was adorned with trains. His mother’s faced glowed with a grin, reaching for the stoic-faced babe snuggling him close to his chest. The pests huddled together, all eager to see little Alex. A chorus of cooing arose as the woman rocked the child gently, one of the insects even wiping away a tear of joy. The coos turned to clamorous laughter as the infant burped, spilling pale brown liquid on his mother’s cerulean cardigan. Alex gasped, his conscience peering down from the center of his mind. His embarrassment rose as another tape was pulled out, this time dating back to his first day of kindergarten at Pink Meadows Elementary. Alex, who donned a banana-colored tee and black jeans, slowly made his way towards the center of the classroom.
“Hello, young man!”, the middle aged teacher, Mrs. Grieves, greeted warmly.
“H-hi”, Alex murmured shyly, his feet shuffling together.
“May I ask your name?”
“Alex Nuhaven.”, he replied, wide brown eyes darted across the bright red carpet.
“Well, Alex, what would you like to be when you grow up?”, Mrs. Grieves prompted.
“An adult.”, Alex replied with a blank expression.
Mrs. Grieves chuckled. “Why, that will most certainly happen, hon!”, she chimed. “But what kind of job are ye hankering for?”
Alex shrugged. “A delivery man”, he claimed.
Mrs. Grieves looked back at the rest of the kindergarten class. “Why, isn’t that interesting, boys and girls?”, she exclaimed. One child had claimed they wanted to an actor, another a ballerina. She transferred her attention back to Alex. “Why do you want to be a delivery man?”
“So I can you stalk you all!”
The class went dead silent.
“Creepy…”, Ellie White muttered.
“She’s right”, one of the pests agreed, popping some popcorn into his petite pie-hole.
Mrs. Grieves was equally stunned. “That-that’s very neat, Alex.”, she stammered. “You may take your seat now.” The tape stopped. For their final film, the maggots got a glimpse of Alex’s first taste of middle school. 10 year old Alex plopped down at the lunch table at the end, opening his lunch box that was decorated with dank memes. He pulled out a bowl of jello salad, a string cheese, and a pouch of filtered pear juice. Furiously, he tore away the straw wrapper and jabbed at the top hole until he gained access. Alex sipped slowly as he heard footsteps nearby. He saw a lass with bouncy, dark brown curls sit her lunch tray next to his spot.
“Hi, what’s your name?”, she asked, a spoonful of fruit cocktail passing through her fuschia lips.
“I am Alex.” he replied before unwrapping his string cheese. A pang of awkwardness shot through his chest and he began to writhe around in his seat.
“Awesome!”, she squealed. “My name’s Mandy.” She reached her manicured hand out for a handshake. When her hand remained empty, she took Alex’s hand into her own and wiggled it up and down. Alex’s eyes widened and he gritted his teeth. “Nice to meet you, Alex!”
Alex smirked. “I also have some nicknames, too”, he announced.
Mandy beamed. “Ooh, what are they?”, she asked, wiggling around ecstatically. She leaned into his face and purred. “I bet they’re reallyy kawaii!”
“Turdnugget.” he answered. “Jerky Turkey. Butterball. Lemon Head.” He chomped into his jello salad and swallowed. “I am not quite sure what they mean. No one will tell me.”
Mandy cocked an eyebrow, but smiled. “I bet I can find out!”, she insisted. “Trust me, I’m reeaall good at persuading!” Her coppery irises stared Alex’s leafy green ones intently.
Alex simpered gratefully. “Okay.”
“Told you I was good at persuading.”, Mandy said smugly. A weight settled on her jaw. Alex was pressing his head of light brown tresses against hers.
“I’m waiting.”, Alex sighed.
The maggots stopped the movie. “Hold up!”, maggot Salisbury called. “This child can hear voices?!”
“Mmm, sugar bear, that’s right!” The figure of Alex’s conscience was replaced with a curvy woman with plump cherry lips, who whipped her pin-straight, raven locks. “My name’s Suzanne. Nice to meet you, doll-babies.” She shrieked as she tripped over, sinking back into Alex’s brain as a new figure arrived.
“Howdy there, folk!”, he greeted, waving. “I’m Jake Western-and”. The young cowboy pummeled to the ground.
A tiny girl hastened through with pale skin, a corset, and a cotton candy lolita skirt decorated with cupcakes. “I’m Aikino!”, she squeaked. She was promptly nudged aside by an older man, his ecru skin weaving bulging muscles.
“AND I’M RUSSELL!”, he boomed, flexing his arms. “OOHH YYEAAHH!”
The cream-colored bugs shot each other glances. “N-nice to meet you.”, maggot Henrietta managed. The image sooned morphed back into Alex’s body. “Oh, there you are, Alex!”
Alex’s conscience crawled down his brain, utilizing the snarls as a ladder. “Who are you guys and what do you need?” he snarled, hurdling to the floor of his mind.
Maggot Fry flipped open his snakeskin wallet, revealing his business card . “We’re BRATS”, he deemed.
Alex cocked his head to the side. “Thanks you very much for that comment, Captain Obvious.”
Fry shook his head. “Brain Rewirers for Adults, Teens, and Seniors.”, he said matter-of factly. “We’ve gone through your files, and I have came to a conclusion. You’re 68% evil-probably ranking neutral evil on the alignment chart. You’ve lost 90% of your marbles.” Indeed, only a few round marbles were rolling around his brain. “You’re more awko than a taco, and you’re insane in the ole membrane.” With a cloud of smoke, he was dressed as the grim reaper, scythe in place. He waved the scythe, sparks flying through the air. In his mind were 3 wooden doors, one burgundy, one turquoise, and one gold.
“Homo Sapien, choose wisely.”, he cautioned. “If you choose the first one, your memories will be cleansed.” The maggots plastered an artificial smile on their faces, holding brooms and buckets of overflowing, soapy water. “The basics will remain-names, dates, how to masticate, how to pinch loaves, etc. But the unclean acts you have committed will be sent to oblivion, spaghettified by a black hole.” He went to the second door. “This is the door of dreams.”, he stated. “All your evil desires will be fulfilled-but there will be a backfire. Your heavenly pursuits-such as being a meme master or feasting on Kepeche Son, will never come true!”. He motioned to the final door on the right. “This is perhaps the most curious door.”, he affirmed. “If you choose this door, you will be sent to the planet of Shiekdabudei. Like Earth, it has its ups and downs. Shiekdabudei is most famous for its nightclubs, its fuel on cheesy pizza bagels, and its most common career of being an admin. Your mind will be transferred to a body like your own, while I’ll take over this one.” Alex didn’t find the decision an arduous one. Fry was more than welcome to have his body if that’s what pleased him. In fact, in the midst of his judgement, he could feel his younger sister, Dazey, blippng him with his anime body pillow in an attempt for him to get up. If there was a refresh button on his life, so be it! With his punny puns, he could be a grate admin like a litany of the cheesy pizza bagel-loving inhabitants.. Maybe he wouldn’t be a potato in a rose garden; he would leave a copy of his autobiography for people to read his enriching history. Alex pointed to the golden door.
“I’m gonna go with this one.” Alex decided. “Ciao, brats.”
“Patience, youngling!”, Fry shouted. “Are you absolute certain-” Alex stared at the door handle and slowly turned the knob.
