Where have all the haters gone?

You know how these Smackdowns work - someone says an artist or a trend or a new gizmo is great, and someone else says it's crap. At least, that's how it's supposed to work. This being public radio, people come in here and start to think they have to be measured and reasonable and we end up with people finding areas of consensus and genuine dialogue.

I hate when that happens.

When someone on the staff suggested a Smackdown on Kelly Clarkson, our task (well, actually Gisele's task, since she is producing the segment) was clear: find someone to defend Clarkson's honor against the ravages of whatever critic we would pull from a long list of Clarkson haters. Gisele started reaching out to our stable of critic/writer friends, and found, to our mutual amazement, that EVERYONE likes Kelly Clarkson! Even such reliably rockist places as Pitchfork had nice things to say about her.

I don't understand. I mean, I love the fact that she stood up to Clive Davis, the grand pooh-bah of the US record industry and therefore the closest thing we have to a real live Darth Vader, but unfortunately, that tale didn't end too well: she released her album My December the way she wanted it, and watched it sell relatively poorly, and ended up apologizing to Davis. Still, as the old saying goes, when a donkey flies, you don't blame him for not staying up very long.

I guess I just don't understand the near unanimity of the music critics (thankfully there's at least one hater out there, as you'll hear today) in their praise of her. I mean, critics are normally such a contentious bunch - but we actually had an easier time finding a Springsteen detractor!

What am I missing? Clarkson fans, explain please. And if there's anyone else out there who just doesn't get Kelly Clarkson, please - please - let me know. I feel so all alone...